Thursday, May 12, 2011

Why Is The Outside World Not Enough

A thought occurred to me today whilst in the midst of a pity party.

Why are external factors not enough to make us lose our weight? 

For example.

If in my mind I think Heather thinks I am sexier at 160 than 170...why don't I do everything within my power to get and stay at 160?  Why is it not motivation enough?

Same thing goes for those of you who say I am losing weight for:

My career
My kids
My husband
To Start Living Life
To go shopping and not have to cry in the dressing room
To fit into an airplane seat
To look hot in a swimsuit

Why isn't it motivation enough?  When we are getting ready to eat cookies and cakes and suck sugar and such...why aren't those things that are the most important things in our lives enough to prevent us from eating?

It should be shouldn't it? 

And I know that "we have to do it for ourselves"...but my question is WHY?  Don't we love being desired enough?  Love our kids enough?  Want to fit into that pencil skirt to get that raise enough?

Think of biggest loser and the folks that go home early but still have a chance to win the at-home prize of $100,000.  I always think "Hell, for $100,000 I would starve myself for 3 months"...but for some of them...even a great deal of money isn't enough.

I suppose it may have something to do with addiction.  But I can't wrap my brain around it.


  1. He who knows that knows everything!

  2. Short term joy/satisfaction/whatever, trumps the long term? Immediate satisfaction?

  3. Because while those things are the most important things to you in your life, you cannot really FEEL what they are feeling. You know Heather loves you and finds you desirable regardless of how much you weigh. You know you can be a good mom regardless of how much you weigh. You know you're competent at your career regardless of how much you weigh. It's only that inner sadness or inner discontent that can really motivate you to change. Let's say none of this is true. Let's say Heather, your parents, your kids, your boss...whoever WOULD love you more if you lost weight. It's still not enough because we're not empaths...we can't FEEL what they FEEL...the sadness or embarrassment or worry for your health, etc. We can't FEEL it. We can only guess and we're probably not going to guess to what degree they feel the way they do. OK...rambled enough. Did any of this make sense?

  4. I think it is enough in theory but giving up our drug... is hard. It chemical baby... even after I eat whatever it is, and it doesn't taste as great as I thought it would, Why do I give in the next time?

  5. It's definitely addiction. I have so many things that could motivate me, should motivate me, and I still binge on everything in sight. And it's not just once in a while. It is still such a daily struggle to just eat decent let alone healthy. I look at myself and think, gah what am I doing??? I see myself lately in the mirror and am slowly watching myself climb back to 200lbs. It's scary as hell and I feel like I DON'T have control. It's mindless what I do. I am taking some bitter orange right now just to keep from craving everything all the time and it's still not preventing me from wanting things, from wanting to say "FUKITOL" on a daily basis.

  6. Hmmmmmm...that's a good question.

    I think it is because in the moment when we are chosing food, there isn't neccessarily a direct correlation between out action and the eventual consequences. We want the instant gratification of the food rather than the long-term results from making good choices.

  7. Great questions - and I'm sure it's the addiction. I've been thinking a lot about addiction, myself, lately...even though I WANT to lose weight, I'm repulsed at my lack of progress over the last few months, etc...I still drive down the street and get the steak nachos. Hmm. Time for a therapist?

  8. It is these very questions that have led me to seek counseling finally. I feel like there has to be an element I'm not seeing/feeling that allows me to not be strong enough to resist food. If I find the secret, I'll pass it along.