Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Massage The Rear: Mommy Likes

You probably dont remember, because it was rather forgettable, but I had my first massage last fall.  It was an hour long, and I slept through the last 30 minutes of it.  The lady was about 4 feet 1 inch tall, and basically...petted me.  Granted, I did not speak up.  I did not tell her harder...deeper...

wow...that sounds dirty

Anywhoozle, about the same time I bought a gift certificate for a massage for Heather.  I SWEAR (even though she now denies it) that she said she wanted one.  Apparently, the very idea of a massage where a stranger touches her makes her want to rip her toenails off...so...I used the damn thing today!

The masseuse came highly recommended, has been doing it for years, and specializes in everything from the "spa massage" to medical massages. 

I told him some of my tight areas, that I worked out alot, didn't want to be petted during the massage, and wanted to feel it.  Towards the end, he definitely said that I like deep tissue and have a high pain tolerance. 

I started on my stomach and he worked my ass like nobody's business.  It was really amazing.  Here is what we have uncovered from today massage (I realize YOU may not care, but I will share just in case).

  1. The pain I feel in my upper hamstring (think of where my ass and leg meet) is probably being caused by the fact that I like to sleep on my stomach and hike my right leg up in a 90 degree angle.
  2. Also, my quads are extremely developed (I think he was stroking my ego for a bigger tip...it worked) and are disproportionate to my hamstrings...causing my hamstrings to be tighter bc they are trying to balance me out.
  3. When I rolled over and he started to massage my upper pecs, he immediately said "Okay...how many push ups have you been doing ".(ego stroke, add one dollar) I told him yesterday was my push up day and I typically do 6 sets of 17.  He was surprised I hadnt mentioned back pain between my shoulder blades bc I have built my chest and upper/front body up so much that it is pulling my shoulders forward.  This makes me a tad sad bc A) I WILL NOT HAVE A HUNCHBACK and B)I work my back out A LOT damn it.
  4. He showed me several stretches to do for my problem areas and tried to convince me that I need to start stretching more to lengthen my muscles. 

It was really a great hour. 

And while we are on the subject of muscles, I have begun to up my strength training a wee bit.  During the Biggest Loser challenge, I was adding more cardio to the circuit stations and using lighter weights (nothing really above 20 pounds).  Well, now that the competition is over and I have gained about 8 pounds back (huh...funny how tons of beer and carb loaded food will do that), I decided I will just become a beast. 

If you can't beat em...join em.

I am also working on developing a JLO-tastic ass.  Squats with weights, squats without.  Side lunges, forward lunges...here a lunge, there a lunge...everywhere a lunge lunge.

And then about 2 weeks before Memorial Day...I am going to cardio it UP!  I will explain why in another post.

Until then my little Robins...

Batman out.


  1. Just want to point out that you and I sleep in the exact same position. That's all. :)

  2. Hahaha, I sleep that way too! Didn't think anybody else did! Except I have to have a foot sticking out of the blankets too!

  3. I sleep on my back so that I won't have wrinkles!! well, no more than I already have, that is. I love a good deep tissue massage, and get thee to Pilates that will lengthen you (I'm not a trainer, but I play one on TV)

  4. I love massages! But only good ones. My new massage therapist is really into stretching and I LOVE it. Glad you found a good one!

  5. My massage lady and I have a very special relationship. She pounds the bleep out of me about every three months, I am then sore for 3 days after, but after day 3....Can you say BLISS! I can move my neck and back around with out cringing. I love me some deep tissue pounding!

  6. lovvvve massages! A good "hard" one lol

  7. Woohoo - you stayed awake - YAY! We should get massages in Chicago...um yes - that is me asking again. Loves you!

  8. I have never had a massage but you make me want to get naked and be petted and pounded ;)

  9. Oh...and I REALLY want to be able to do push ups. If you ever have a brain fart and can't think of something to blog about then please feel free to blog about how to go from can't-get-your-gut-off-the-floor to Super-Stud-Amy-push-ups. Just saying. XOXO

  10. that area you refer to in point #1 is what I lovingly refer to as the b'thigh - where the butt and thigh meet. just thought i'd share

  11. Sounds like a very knowledgeable masseur. I'm with Heather, though. Don't want some stranger feeling me up. Plus, I'm lucky because my hubby gives awesome massages and I can pay him in trade. **wink wink** ;)

  12. Just like you to boast about the great massage you had :p

    From the looks of it I am not the only one that sleeps like that. Amazing how we all thought that :o)

  13. These shape up type sneakers(Mine are New Balance True Balance or Rock and Tones)really work your ass out. George can't keep his hands off my hinds. Not that I'm complaining but I don't really work out my buttocks at all... So it must be the magic sneaks. Great job on the challenge... You are amazing!

  14. FYI I got here via Catherine over at Chronicles from Band Land. I'm starting to work my way backwards through your posts however thought I better comment here first.

    I *highly* recommend dropping by www.katysays.com to check out some stretches for your hammies. And also for your chest/back. Well pretty much all over stretches! I have a feeling they will rock your world, especially the double calf stretch.