Monday, September 20, 2010

I Suppose We Should Chat

Although it won't really do any good...

For those of us going to Chicago (and for those of you who AREN'T've gotta be getting sick of us)...

I think it's fair to say that a majority of us have lost our precious little minds. We are stressing ourselves out! And do you know why? Because we are WOMEN.

And DAMN....we are so silly!

Here is a conversation I had with myself today:

Self: "Crap. What in Carrie Bradshaws name am I going to wear on Saturday for a day of shopping and relaxing? What shoes am I going to wear? Will I be able to breathe in my dress on Saturday night? What pajama's are going to make my boobs look good? Do I need to wear matching bra and panties in case we take our clothes off at a club? What should I travel in?

blah blah basdlfkjsdlfkjasdl;fjsdl;fkj sdklfj craptastic balkjdldkjf dlsjkf

And then:

Self: "Uh...CHECK YO SELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YOURSELF BIATCH! These people have seen you (on your own damn blog), in your underwear, bent over, showing your bellyskin. They have seen your power panties on a vlog. They have heard you talk about poop, vagina's, buttcrack hair. They have seen your before picture.

They know you jackass."

So, I guess what I am trying to say is...

It will be okay. It will be okay if you can't find a dress, or if your shoes don't match. It will be okay if you can't find that perfect outfit, or if your luggage is crap (me...mee...ooooh...meeee!). It will be okay if you can't walk to dinner bc the heels you did manage to find are more "bedroom shoes" then dinner shoes...because some of you have volunteered to carry the rest of us who are wearing the stupid shoes. Someone DID volunteer right?

And I have to remind myself that it will be okay if I am not as entertaining, smart, charming, witty, and stunning (and humble) as I come off on my blog. OOOH, wouldn't it be funny if it was like a Scooby Doo episode and someone rips face off and exposes me as Mr. Gruff the school janitor?


True Story.

Now that I have said all that I feel so much better.

Excuse me though...I have to go and stand in front of my closet and cry.

I mean really...WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?


  1. You are so right, Amy! We will all be fabulous, and we will all have FUN!

  2. Yes, my dear little are right!

  3. For frick sake - yes - I'll carry anyone who can't walk in heels. I'll try anyway.

  4. ummm i think that at one point i said i would carry draz....if need be i will carry you amy!! lol
    for my boobies looking good in my jammies i plan on wearing a sports bra (not that my boobies look good in one, but definitely not so national geographic-like) and telling everyone that i normally wear one to bed....oopps guess the cat is out of the bag! lol

  5. Can't wait!! I may have a dress that would work for you!

  6. You summed everything up perfectly in this post! We have all seen each other looking like death on the day after surgery pictures with our bloated stomachs and standing in from of the camera with our saggy boobs and granny panties in our "before surgery" pictures...and we couldnt look much worse than that right?! haha cant wait to meet all you beautiful ladies!!

  7. Once are the voice of reason and have slapped my ass back into reality! I think there may be a line of BOOBS willing to carry yo ass to da club or da hotel!!! Afterall, you are a SUPERSTAR!

  8. I vote for a cab to the restaurant 4 blocks from the hotel...yes my shoes are that cute and that un wearable and no way you guys could carry me! I haven't even started packing yet; you guys are starting to stress me out! It will just be wonderful and overwhelming to see everyone. Can't wait to see you there chicka!

  9. I just really love you Amy...really I do!!

  10. You will look gorgeous in whatever you wear and be as perfectly charming and be as Amy as you are... A ray of sunshine. *Maria*-blogger from "This one time at BAND Camp..."

  11. you guys have a blast in Chicago!!!! I'd be jealous, but i'll be recuperating from tomorrow's lapband surgery :)

  12. Although I'm not going to Chicago (ugh, how many times have I said that), I'm sure you and the rest of the BOOBs crew will look fabulous. You are getting together to fellowship not to critique each other on weight loss, fashion and boob sizes although its always fun to compare, LOL!! Anyway, have fun and see this time as a time to de-stress and get away from it all. Enjoy!!!

  13. Have fun in Chicago. I wish I could make it. I know you will look great no matter what. I'm in the Florida Panhandle...about 45 minutes east of Pensacola.

  14. Oh my, I just started to have a panic attack worrying about what everyone is going to think of me when I get to Chicago, feeling like maybe I should go ahead and cancel, I'm not ready for it yet, after all, I am just starting my journey, I haven't even had my band yet........

    then I remembered, I'm not going.....then anxiety turned into worries, I'm crashing next years adventure.....

  15. I am soooo jealous of the you. Sooo yessss shut up about chicago already.. But anyways wiping the tears away. You go have fun. Live it up and shake what your momma gave ya...

  16. If we can't be comfortable with our BOOBs then who the hell CAN we be comfortable with? Maybe I'm not as stressed because I haven't lost a lot of weight and know that I have no way of pulling off gorgeous. My main goal is to be comfortable and enjoy every minute I can with all the lovely ladies that I've come to know and love.