Saturday, April 3, 2010

Irrational Anger

About 4 times a year I get really really angry. By angry, I mean I raise my voice, close my eyes, and usually...scream.

The rest of the year, I am pretty zen. I take deep breaths. I laugh at myself. I don't cry over spilt milk.

For example, last week while doing the dishes, I broke one our good plates. 5 minutes later I broke a mug. No problem.

Tonight though, whilst unwrapping my Skinny Cow ice cream cone, the cone flew out of my hand, landing ice cream side down on the floor, breaking off the tip of the cone and coating the ice cream with cat hair.

Tracey laughed.

I lost my shit.

Seriously. I picked the cone up, saw the hair on it, hurled it in the sink, screamed, slapped the counter with my hands so hard they are still stinging, and marched into the other room and screamed at the wall.

I still don't know why. Poor Tracey didn't know what to think. Like I said...I don't get angry and yell at things.

It took me about 15 minutes to be able to speak. I apologized to Tracey. I asked him to get me another cone from the fridge and unwrap it for me.

This is/was so irrational and I really think it had to do with the fact that I had ruined my treat. Food death mourning.

I need therapy.


I just wanted to share.


  1. Ok. I laughed but this is so not funny. Last weekend Jeff and I shared a Ben & Jerry's orange cream waffle cone at the food & wine festival we went to. Anyways, he was being nice sharing and offered the last bit of the bottom of the cone to me (You know, the BEST freaking part at the bottom of the cone where the ice cream has sort of melted into the cone and it's a little soggy but still crunchy at the same time?). I thanked whomever for giving me such a sweet hubby and was about 2 inches from placing the deliciousness into my mouth when I see Jeff's damn hand snatch the thing out of my hand and shoves the cone into his mouth with a huge smirk on his face. His brother and him were in hysterics for about 10 minutes. It took all my self control to not punch him in the nose. thankful you have Tracey that went and opened another cone for you (even though he did laugh at first too ;)). Jeff still owes me another cone. Prick.

    ....I do love my husband, I promise. That just PISSED.ME.OFF.

  2. Big life changes going on here in band-land. Lots of adjusting.

    Unrelated to the band, but in the big-life-changes oeuvre, when I was preggers with my first baby the Hubs and I stopped on the Jersey turnpike for gas. I ran into the very crowded McDonald's at the rest stop to get some much-craved fries. I hauled them through the soupy humidity of a hot July day, through gas fumes hovering in the air and waddled back to the car at the pump, then spilled them alllll over the floor of the car as I climbed back in.

    There was crying.

  3. Is it wrong of me to think your anger was actually rational? GAWD - if it's the right day - some things just burn my ass and I want to chop someone's nards off. It happens - you take a step back and make your apologies and eat more ice cream. Chin up - now you're not due for another episode for at least a few months and you get to be even more grateful for having someone like Tracey who understands.

  4. Thanks - I needed a laugh!!!

    I tend to go on a slow burn. Takes a lot for me to erupt too - but when I dooooo.......!!!

    If it makes you feel any better my 3 year old just finger painted the inside of my garage (and it's contents) and when I found him he said "I'm sorry mummy - it was an ACCIDENT!!!!" I'm burning SLOWLY!!!

  5. I find myself at times getting so angry that I know there is no reason for it but it doesn't change anything. Later, when I've calmed down, I know it was stupid of me, but in the heat of the moment, I can't seem to shake the anger and it just has to be released. So far, the only thing that still shows the mark of my anger is my dishwasher which bares the dents of the turkey italian sausage that fell out of my freezer, when I was already irate, and I picked it up and threw it at the dishwasher.

    We just have to experience the moment and be sure to apologize later for it if someone was unfortunate enough to witness it.

  6. You know whats funny about this post is that I was just reading your blog the other day and I was thinking that you always seem so happy in your blog and never talk about getting mad. So I actually just wondered the other day if you ever did get mad, or if you were always just in a good mood. Now you seem more normal after the ice cream freak out. =) Everyone needs to get mad once in a while!

  7. Poor you...sometimes I just flip out over the smallest of things, yet cool calm and collected in more serious misfortunes....a good scream can be quite calming (and gets you back to your zen like self)...a good kick or punch does the trick too! I can see why it was over spilt icecream....At least Tracey is understanding and still loves you...xx

  8. Sorry to hear about the melt down, at least yousay sorry. you look awesome in your shorts by the way

  9. You are so not alone. Just this week, one of my coworkers dropped her entire container of lunch lo mein on the floor and spazzed out pretty severely. After that, a group of us sat and told stories of times we'd dropped or otherwise ruined our food. Everyone had at least one story, and everyone admitted that they had FREAKED OUT when it happened (in my story of pad-thai-down-the-sink, I sat down on the kitchen floor and cried).

  10. Wow. You went primal. It happens! I spilled my coffee all over my Mac book and freaked. My husband thought I was worried about my computer, but I was pissed about the coffee!

  11. Oh Amy, don't feel bad. We call those "big moods" in my house. As in, "LEAVE ME ALONE, I'M IN A BIG MOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!"

    My big moods tend to strike about 5-7 days before my period but sometimes I like to shake things up and keep Jarrett on his toes with a random big mood.

    It keeps things interesting.

  12. If you need therapy over 4 times a year, I am a lost case...LOL! It just happens sometimes :).

  13. I freak out regularly about food for all kinds of reasons. You are lucky that you only get that worked up 4 times a year! I am like a tightly wound spring just waiting for something to trigger a good freak-out session. ;)

    P.S. Your new shorts are awesome and you are looking super hot these days!!

  14. Walt usually is the one that blows up in our house!! But, I have been known to lose it too!! I am a slow burn, so if I do reach the boiling point, you know it!!

    Especially if it means I lost my Ice Cream!! LOL

    I love the new shorts.

  15. I just got a chance to read this...and I wanted you to know that if ever a Skinny Cow takes a tumble when you and I are out, I will scream with you. :) I hope you had a great weekend!!!

  16. Whoa! I see you have lost quite a bit this week!!!! Yay Amy!

  17. I'm sorry Amy, but I laughed!! You tell a story so well. I couldn't help it.

    The shorts are so cute.

  18. we all need a little freak out every now & then :-)

  19. When ice cream is the only shit that'll go down with no complaints - man I'd lose my rag too if it ended up in the cat hair. Having said that - I have a theory so listen up - I reckon we all have a three month cycle and its some time around the new moon that we all have a spackattack and go feral. Check out the blogs at the moment - everyones losing it. ( i swear to god my 8 year old is having a meltdown as we speak!) I think everything builds up and up and we need a 3monthly cleanse and purge period and then we're all good for another 3 months. Dead set. Watch it and you'll notice.

  20. I would have rinsed it off and ate it anyway. Hence my need for the band. :)

    I'm new to LB-Land...been reading your blog! Congrats on the better you! -T