Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Come Here and Take Shelter Under My (bat)Wing

So much to talk about, so much to share.  Here is where we will begin.  We will start with the most current happenings and move backwards.

Tonight Heather spoke at our weight loss surgery support group.  She has known about this for months, and public speaking is not exactly her cup of tea.  It doesn't give her warm fuzzies.  She has eaten all of her fingernails, most of her cuticles, and perhaps an actual finger bone.  Do finger bones have a real name? 

So she had a list of questions submitted in advance and we made a little powerpoint.  Her focus, or topic, was strength training and how it pertains to the weight loss journey. There were tons of question about when, where, how much, how to build a butt, and how to get rid of skin and batwings.  She sited a pretty good article about skin and demonstrated different moves that target the triceps. During this time, a girl raised her hand and stood up.  She said she completely agreed with how important working out was, but that she had batwing surgery and still had droopy arms.  She showed her arms.  And yes, they had batwings. 

And then she started to cry.

She called herself disgusting.

And I knew I had to act quick.  Mainly because she was going to have me crying if she kept on.

So this is what I said.

"First of all, you are beautiful." (she was really cute)  And yes, we have batwings.  But what is the alternative?  I weighed 327 and was "full" but going to fat. No batwings.  Just fat arms. And there is a trade off.  We are healthy now, with a little bit of sag."

I went on to make some joke about how, like a flying squirrel I could jump off a building, spread my batwings and fly.  I talked about my boobies...how they are like socks and tennis balls.  I tried to tell her that we are all jacked up somewhere...but it certainly doesn't make us disgusting.

We are better than when we started. 

And yes.  There are times when my saggy boobs, elephant inner thighs, loose belly, batwings, and cellulite all combine in some cataclysmic end of the world moment...and if it is paired with lack of sexy time...lord I am one ledge away from being labled a "jumper"...but most of the time I don't feel disgusting. 

And certainly, all my beautiful people, a little bit of crazy skin does not make us disgusting.  I hope I get a chance to meet that girl again so I can give her little Eskimo kisses or show her what I look like naked...okay...not totally naked...but you get my point.

Or perhaps I have no point.

Back to Heather.  She was supposed to talk for 30 minutes.  We barely managed to shut her up after an HOUR.  She did very good though.  Cracked a few jokes, told funny stories.  I am very lucky to have her as my girlfriend.

With that said, I heard a nasty rumor that someone said that I am an unfair example of how the lapband can work because I have Heather.


stop the record

Let it be known that Heather is the most amazing person I have ever met.  Let it be know that my muscles would not be what they are without her.  She is extremely motivating in the fitness sense...but also let it be known I lost 140-150 pounds before I fell madly in love with her.  And the one thing she cannot do is keep the food out of my mouth.  If having a personal trainer, or a nutritionist, or money made weight loss easy....OPRAH WOULD BE THIN.

I rest my case.

She keeps me pushing forward, but I do a little bit of the work as well.

I rest my case.


And yes...Dr. Friedman did come to support group to give me a hug. And for one brief moment in the doorway of the meeting room, I was sandwiched between Heather and Dr. Friedman.  It was like a dream.  In fact, I have actually had that dream...

but there were less clothes involved.

the end

Happy Tuesday!!!


  1. Great post! And yes finger bones have names...metatarsals, metacarpals and phalanges but finger bones are a hell of a lot easier to say!!

  2. Great post...wish I had a Heather to motivate me :) For now, it's just me and the band. What wonderful things you said to that girl! I will take the batwings over the poor health any day.

  3. The people who say you have an unfair advantage by having a personal trainer girlfriend are BFF's with the people who say we all "cheated" or "took the easy way" by getting a band. I have found that the majority of folks who wanna criticize my weight loss are either A) other overweight people who are still too afraid of WLS or not fed up enough to get WLS and are still waiting for the "magic" that finally lets them lose the weight they wanna lose or B) normal weight people who are pissed that you are no longer the "fat chick" that they get to use to make them selves feel better about their shortcomings.

    Don't get me wrong--- you are blessed as hell to a great person who loves you who just so happens to be able to run your ass all over the gym like a pro.

    That poor girls story just breaks my heart. There are still too many WLSers here in the world who, despite tremendous success, just can't cut themselves a damn break. It makes me so sad.

  4. that poor girl... i just want to give her a hug!!

  5. You rock... and I wish I could have seen Heather's presentation.

  6. whoever thought/said that is a moron

  7. Sounds like she did great! My belly is the thing that bothers me most. 2 kids and a lot of fat later...it's just never going to be the same. But at least it'll fit into regular clothes now so it's improvement.

  8. Damn, I wanted to be there last night, but I had to work. Sorry I missed a great group meeting.

  9. I love this post! You are so right about the need to love and not hate where we are. And the haters, well, what can you do? You have earned every single lb lost, every single bit of muscle gained and deserve all the credit in the world!

    I think Heather is a rock star for coming and talking at your group. She is definitely a keeper!

  10. Great post!! You are such a great motivator, Amy.

  11. You're going to love this... "phalanges." LOL

    Great post -- really enjoyed reading it!

  12. Does Heather travel? I think it's only about an 11-12 hour down here to Ft. Lauderdale from where you are! Of course you're doing the work. Is it any different for all the people who HIRE personal trainers? You just get a bonus because you don't have to pay her in money (I assume), just extra sexy time. :) And I think what you said to the poor girl in your group was perfect. We all did this because we didn't want to be unhealthy and fat anymore and if a little extra skin is all we have to deal with then we are lucky. It does suck, but not as much as being heavy or sick.

  13. I am determined to make my oh-so-serious Russian doctor more like your cool one!

  14. You just about made me cry. I do find my floppy arms "disgusting" but maybe I need to just get over that shit and accept them for what they are - another symbol of how far I've come.