Friday, October 21, 2011

It's Official: I Cannot Hit a Ball But I am Precious When I Try

Last night one of my worst fears was realized. 

That's right.  I actually had to play softball on Heather's co-ed slow pitch team. 

I prepped her team.  Tried to get them to really  understand that I cannot hit the ball.   They didn't believe me.  I mean, in their defense, I LOOKED GOOD.  I had my UnderArmor spandex on for God's sake.  I had a fresh haircut.  I was nonverbally screaming "Sexy Softball Player". 

I was last in the line up.  I was hoping for an improtu hurricane, an off season Kansas tornado in Florida.  Something.  ANYTHING.

I got up there to bat.  I was literally shaking.  You could see it from the dugout.

I took a deep breath.  Winked at the pitcher (thought maybe it would help).  And I promptly struck out.

I was welcomed back to the dugout with cheers and pats on the back.  The guys and girls on the team were amazing.  They weren't angry.  I didn't poop my pants.

Next several times up to bat, I walked.  Woo, that was close.  I even almost made it to 3rd base once but ran too far past it, touched the line coach and got out for touching.

Yes.  You can't touch the line coach.  Huh. Or he can't touch you.  Go figure I would get out in a softball game for inappropriate touching.

They named me MVP of the first game.  I felt very loved.  And very terrible at softball.  I made friends with the ump at homeplate, chatted up cute fellas in the dugout.  And never once did I feel like the FAT girl who couldnt play.  I just felt like the silly cute girl who couldn't play. 

That's progress huh?  I think so.


  1. I love this! Congrats on MVP!!

  2. Good for you! Sounds like you had a blast.

  3. awesome!!! i miss you, my friend... any chance of either chicago next september or a nyc trip this spring/summer with catherine & jennifer??? love you...