Thursday, August 20, 2009

Why you little booger....

*this post is gross. But who else can I share it with if not you?


After my post yesterday about being tight, I sat down for lunch. This is what I had brought

It is quick, easy, kinda bland, and contrary to the picture, not super chunky. I figured I would be good to go. Well, I ate about 3 tablespoons, which included a few little chunks of chicken. And that was all she wrote folks! Something was stuck. I had started eating at 11am bc I had a training to go to at noon. For the next 2 hours or so, I went to the bathroom to "bring up" the slobber that was backing up. I had to keep walking out of the training. So finally, I whispered to my coworker that I was not coming back in the classroom until "I get this motherfu*(&^ up". I went to the bathroom, leaned over the pretty toilet, and after a few really bad dry heaves, something came out.

Now, I have mentioned before that when this happens to me, a good deal of what was in my throat comes out my nose. It is gross. So after I was done dealing with the porcelain god, I walked over to the paper towels to start blowing the rest of the food out my nose. I must not have been holding the paper towel correctly, bc I blew and everything shot on my chest. All of the rice I had eaten from the soup was now on my chest. And my first thought was "OH MY GOD! MAGGOTS!

Then I had to stop and say "No Amy, those arent maggots, that is rice". Have mercy. My mind. So that was gross but I felt better after that.

Later in the day I was sitting at my desk and I felt something in my nose. Thought it was a boogie/nose gremlin, bat in the cave. Nope. It was black bean. Sure enough. Good times.

So, at dinner time, I was fully resigned to just eating some mashed potatoes and green beans, but I decided to give a pork chop a go. I got about 3oz, cut it into pea sized bites...AND NO PROBLEM! I ate it all! So good. And put my mind at ease.

17 comments:

  1. I don't think you would be a great product marketer for Campbell's. Sorry I was laughing at your story but do I want to say that I am sorry for that happening to you...I have so much to look forward to. BTW the undies in my photos are actually my PJ pants!

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  2. LOL... It was a BLACKBEAN! oh my goodness... I had a BITE 1 BITE of eggs this morning and Had to go hit the toilet. :o(
    This fill for me has really worked, Now I just need to work on Slowing down and remembering to chew chew chew like always sometimes I forget.

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  3. Are they your PJ's? lol, thats good bc I thought they were kinda loose for undies, but everyone is different! LOL!

    mary-I know! Did I just think I had restriction before? NO, I must have had it but not like this, so now I have to be a good bander and chew, small bites, wait to see if it is okay...chew, repeat...

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  4. OMG. I just about peed my pants laughing at my desk...sorry. I love your stories! I got stuck twice yesterday. I was so stinkin hungry when I got home from work I think I inhaled a piece or roast beef lunch meat and not 30 seconds later I was on the bathroom floor. I think my dog thought I was going to die.

    Also, instead of cleaning and going through clothes last night, we went to a movie so I'll go through my stuff tonight and see what I can find for you! I'll take some pics and send them your way :)

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  5. Poor Amy! That was funny though. Sorry. :)

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  6. I am laughing SO HARD but trying not to make noise b/c I am reading at work. Hysterical. Wow... Glad it didn't end up being a jalepeno pepper!

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  7. Honey, you're supposed to chew your food. It's not crack, it's not for snorting!

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  8. ROFL!!!!! "Good times". LOL :O)

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  9. Amy- you still have my back-fat jiggling. I can't stop laughing!!! Sorry, but you are hilarious.

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  10. Oh you poor girl! That sounded miserable - and ick and downright sore. I hope this sorts for you soon, it's not fun!

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  11. You are a hoot. Hey, I saw that Rob and Amber live in Pensacola...are ya'll neighbors???

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  12. This is one for the history books... you have to retell this frequently!! LOL I'm sorry you had such issues though and then none at dinner.. man pork probably never tasted so good!

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  13. Dangit, Amy, I am sorry you had a horrible time of it. But I must say, I just laughed out loud and my dog started barking at me.

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  14. Tiffany- "Man pork", is this what it's called nowadays? I need to catch up on my slang. ;)

    LOL

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  15. LMAO - you evil woman... catching me on my grammar like that. I have friends that call me the grammar nazi even.. they would be so ashamed!

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  16. omg I can't believe it comes out your nose! Sooooooooooooo gross. I would tell your doc that something is wrong w/ your sinus'. that made me want to barf! I'm at 7cc in my band today, just got it, so I'm going to be SUPER CAREFUL for the next week, I hate to throw up. I get all those red dots on my face from the blood vessels in my face popping, it's horrible.

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