Angie's latest post on maintaining her weight loss got me thinking.
I am one pound away from "Goal".
And as I have been inching closer to the "finish line", I have really started to think about what that means.
I find it humorous that there are many of us, without assistance from our docs, who just picked our goal weight out of our own scattered brains. We picked a number that sounded good, one that would safely distance ourselves from being labeled "obese"...and we started working towards this goal.
And I have yet to see one of us get to our "goal weight" and not want a little bit more. For example, I don't know why I didnt pick 167 as my goal weight because that would have put me at 160 pounds lost. A nice even number. So of course...I will go for 167 pounds as my next goal. AND THEN, I start to think...well, why not get down to 160 pounds...because then I will have lost more than I weigh.
And THEN, I think, well, why not make it 157 because that's 170 pounds down.
It can get a little out of hand.
Here is what I know.
I don't want to be skinny. You may not believe me, but I want to have curves. I don't want to look like I have wasted away. I want to look healthy, fit, and have a slammin body (as much as ones body can be slamming with deflated boobies, skin, and stretch marks...but you feel me). So I do worry sometimes about the weight loss NOT stopping.
Does that even make sense? It might be silly and not even something I need to worry about...but I don't want to go to far.
At the same time, if I am working out and eating right...and my body wants to keep losing...should I stop it?
And what does maintenance look like? In my big old head, it looks like this:
Kinda the same thing we have been doing all along to lose the weight with the band. Making more good choices than bad, moving our bodies, keeping in touch with our doctors.
I dunno.
But we will find out soon enough.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
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Amazing success ...
ReplyDeleteI told Angie yesterday that I really don't have an answer to this as I am not even close to my original goal. However; it is something that I have wondered about, how does one maintain? As I told her, once you figure it out, let me know the secret!
ReplyDeleteI picked my original goal to be 160, because that would be 100 even down for me. That sounds doable at this point. I feel the same way - I love my curves and I don't want to lose them. When will it be enough? I hope you just feel it... <3
This is a bit controversial, but I think for many of us, there is a bit of us that WANTS to be super skinny - even if just for a day or two. To be as skinny (not anorexic, mind you) as a supermodel, to feel skin against muscle and bone, rather than skin against pudge. I know I want it, if just for a day! But in reality, I am like you. I know that my frame looks better with curves, with a little cushion in the cushion, so to speak. But having that desire to be 'the be all, end all' for so many years and never being able to have it CAN lead to a problem, as you acknowledge, as we begin to reach our goal weight and contemplate going smaller, lower. Even though I denied it so much in the beginning, I didn't want to admit that I had a problem, I do believe that so many of us have problems with food, in forms of psychological issues. Unless we heal those issues as the lbs go down, I could surely see those issues morphing into others, such as anorexia. I recently saw a show called Intervention, where a woman who had WLS, reached her goal weight after losing 150 lbs, and kept going until she was skeletal. She was so afraid of going back, that she developed the opposite problem. She ate all the time, she just never swallowed the food. She simply spit it all up into a Big Gulp cup. Her family had to intervene.
ReplyDeleteGood post Amy - many if not all of us will have to deal with these issues as we reach goal.
I debate everyday if the run is over or if I should keep going. Right now my goal is as high on the bmi normal scale as I can get. The doctor said I could have stopped at 190 (I have no idea where he got that number)...I guess I will see how close I can get to 164.5 and then call the loss quits....well that is unless i just keep losing :)
ReplyDelete.... Sometimes I wonder what "Amy would do" on a day that I am struggling - thanks for putting yourself and your thoughts out there for ALL of us! :-)
ReplyDeleteI have been banded for 16 months, started at 246 and just hit 145 pounds. I'm now an Australian 10 (US 6, I think).
ReplyDeleteI'm genuinely concerned that it won't stop. I've pretty consistently lost about 6 pounds a month, and it hasn't yet showed signs of slowing. I don't want to be really thin, just healthy.
I have a theory that when my body gets to where it wants to be, it'll stop.
As someone who just got banded the idea of weight loss not stopping is so wonderful I can't even pretend to know what you are feeling. I'll let you know in a year or so. :)
ReplyDeletefinally catching up on your blog... looking good and sounding good. on the body image post i just wanted to comment that one of the things i am working on is to stop "body checking" --- you know standing in front of the mirror for 10 minutes inspecting my sagging skin. i will probably blog about it soon.
ReplyDeleteThanks for posting about this Ames. I've kinda realized I'm not ready to stop, but maybe that's just cause I'm better at losing than maintaining. Really interesting stuff, eh?
ReplyDeleteIn terms of size - I find as few as 5lbs will change me in a denim size, 10lbs will certainly change you down to a 10 or 8(!!)
I want to be curvy too! My husband is makes a comment here and there that he doesn't want me to loose all of my "womanliness". I think it's funny. I tell him how about I get out of the plus sizes (nothing would be more gratifying) and then we can talk about what's too much lol. I just want to be a clothes whore. plain. and simple. I want to by stylish CHEAP clothing and not have to worry about going into a store and wondering in they carry my size.
ReplyDeleteI'd love to do the right thing and say its about "a healthier life" mostly... and it is... mostly. But a pretty big part of it is about the clothes ;)
Congrats on your weight loss. I don't think it matters how low you can go, as long as you feel healthy! You are so inspiring to me!
ReplyDeletei must do a post on this i had a huge thought :-)
ReplyDeletebtw i had dream about you last night and we were in chicago and i got mad at you because you were so skinny lol
I will probably freak out when I get near goal like you. I mean you look amazing and have been incredibly successful with your weight loss and I hope to be also... but Maintaining is the reason I had this band installed. I need it's help in that area, because I have always struggled with maintaining in the past. I have never actually tried to not lose weight. *Maria*
ReplyDeleteYou have been so inspirational to so many people- reading and understanding your journey through your blog has been such a motivating factor. The fact that you have lost so much weight is amazing. I can't wait to have the dilemma of when to stop :)!!
ReplyDeleteI was banded August 2nd and I love reading your blog and seeing your successes
ReplyDeleteAward Time!!
ReplyDeleteAmy your new profile pic is amazing! You look so well. I am at the beginning of this journey so it's hard for me to understand how you are feeling but before I had my band the doctor sent me a DVD about a woman in France who had the band and when she got to goal they were going to take the band out. Right now I am think "no freaking way" but maybe when I am at goal I might think differently. Have you considered having it removed or unfilled?
ReplyDeleteCheck out your ticker girl!!!!
ReplyDeleteI would frame it x