Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Talking Trash About Yourself, PMS, and Other Hateful Things

Okay ladies (I dont think any men read this)...I am PMSing. Which means that I cry at random times. I dont get bitchy. I dont get cramps. I just cry. Like if a commerical comes on...doesn't matter if it is about the new Swiffer...it might make me cry.
So, I havent been working out like I should. Tracey hurt his knee and he was my walking partner. Even though he would run most of the walk, he would still meet back up with me, talk to me, keep me motivated. Now he cant do that. And I am pouting and making excuses. Last night I didnt go walking. And in I think Tracey is in a really difficult place that many supportive partners of any of us trying to lose weight find themselves. He doesnt want to harp on me, but he wants to push me to succeed, but he doesnt want to push too hard and make me mad, but he doesnt want to not push at all and appear that he doesnt care. Do you guys know what I am talking about? So, i felt like I let him down last night by not going, but I really let myself down more...so I cried.

Then, we were laying on the couch and I was looking at my sausage fingers and asked "Do you think I will always be fat"? What a horrible question. Tracey said he couldnt answer that bc I am not fat to him. So...I cried.

Poor Tracey. He already feels like he is letting me down bc his knee is hurt. Which is not true at all. Clearly, from what I just wrote...I need emotional support more than anything. It's hard for him bc he is going to turn 43 this year, and I will be turning 20-10...so he feels like an "old man". He has his MRI on Tuesday. Hopefully it will be something they can fix.

It is supposed to rain here in Pensacola for the next 5 years. Or at least until Saturday...whichever one comes first. So, since my 5k is April 4th...the first chance I get I am doing my full walk!

2 comments:

  1. Hi Amy! Sorry you're so PMS-y - I was last week and felt like total shit, and the world was going to end any minute.

    I love Jodi Picoult, I think I've read all of her books now. The newest one was good, though not my favourite. I think the Pact or 10th Circle was maybe the best... I love all my new bandster buddies, love how much we can all share!

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  2. I often feel bad for both my boyfriend and my daughter because even before the Band, I'm very different in personality from them, so sometimes all is fantastic or it's hellish. LOL... at least they have each other. (Oh, and with my IUD, I no longer get periods or hardcore PMS. Check into having one if you're not interested in having kids. Just make sure to get the one with the hormones so you can go period free.)

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