I Climb Ropes

In elementary school we used to do dangerous things.  You know, things that children aren't allowed to do today because they could "get hurt".

We used to actually do gymnastics in gym.  There was a horse (not the animal kind, but the vaulting kind), there were uneven bars. 

We had a section of p.e. each year where we shot bb guns at targets.  Inside the building.

We played dodgeball.

We leg wrestled (which I owned like a BOSS until 6th grade when Josie McClellan grew 8 feet and my legs stopped growing...forever).

And we climbed ropes that were tied to the ceiling of our gym.  I mean, "tied" might be the wrong word.  They were secured in some fashion.  There was a horn to honk at the top.  And they were awesome.  And I could climb those suckers.  I ain't gonna lie. 

Well, you just don't come upon ropes secured to the ceilings very much anymore.  But we attended a party on Saturday night, a cookout if you will, that was in someones workshop.  And low-and-behold, there was a rope.  Well, I whispered to Heather "Um...I think we can climb that rope"...and then she got all excited bc one of her favorite past times is showing off...so I asked the rope owner for permission.

Permission granted.

Heather climbed the rope in a nano-second. The first time she used her feet.  The second time, after being issued a challenge by the ropes owner, she climbed it with no feet...solely using her arms to pull herself up. 

Impressive.  Whatevs.

After Heather went up, several ladies tried to do the same.  Not.So.Much

Well, I was wearing a skirt.  But I wanted so badly to try. 
See skirt below.

Me to Heather: Too bad I am wearing a skirt.
Heather to Me: Go for it.

Me to Me: It's Go Time.

So I go over.  Take off the sandals.  Take of the ring.

And slap your mama....I climbed that rope, screamed something at the top (probably LIKE A BOSS) and started to come back down.

Look.  Coming back down a rope in a skirt is no fun people.  Rope burn of the vagina is not a way to go out (so I got rope burn on my ankles). 

I was so pumped that I was able to do it. I am sure the view of my thighs and cooter shadowy area was lovely, but I didnt care. 

Afterwards Heather said "I should have taken pictures".  To which I said "Yeah, I took pictures of YOU".  To which SHE said "Well, I didnt think you would be able to do it"...

sccrrrrrreeeeach

Excuse me? 

She said "Well the other girls couldnt do it".

TO WHICH I SAID "DO THEY WORKOUT 6 TIMES A WEEK?

I mean goooood lord?  I would expect better from her.

But, I showed her. hahahahahahaha

I need a rope. I need a tall warehouse to hang the rope. 
Make it happen Universe.  I am going to just start asking the Universe for things.  Like I just posted this status on Facebook:

I mean, all you can do is ask ya know?  And if the universe says no...well I will just punch it in the ham wallet.

In other news, I am starting week 2 of: I just got a band!!!  I am rocking some healthy choices, not going coo coo crazy with denying myself, and working out.  In fact...I have gained 4 pounds since Saturday!  How awesome is that...

yeah...

you read that right.  I am up for pounds, which is beyond Richard Simmons ridiculous.  I am not worrying too much yet (talk to me next Monday), as I am about 1 day away from starting my period and that is the only reason I can possibly fathom for such numerical nonsense.

I went to hot yoga again last night.  I go every so often, but not often enough.  Each time I do go however, I am reminded within 5 minutes of how FLIPPIN HARD IT IS!  People who say yoga is "just stretching" ain't never done yoga mmmmmmkay?