Well, maybe two years...but still...this morning I saw 182 on the scale. Which I dont think I have seen in a couple of years. Funny thing is, my working out has been better than ever...but...
my eating has not.
And this is what I want to say. Lapbandgal posted on FB today (or yesterday) about how you handle Food Pushers. You know, those people that want you to eat, bring bad food into the office or house, say things like "ah, you can enjoy a little bit"...
And I told her that my biggest food pusher...
I dont really have anyone in my life that tries to push food or bad choices on me. I bring them on myself. And this will ALWAYS be my battle. It will be my fight to fight. Somehow along the way (probably much thanks goes to my hardcore girlfriend) I actually have incorporated working out into my EVERYday life. I think about it. I schedule my days around it sometimes. I push myself.
But my addiction to food has not changed in the three years I have had the band. It just hasnt. Whether it is head hunger or actual hunger, I still think about, crave, and sometimes for weeks at a time, indulge in food that I think I want. Sometimes I actually find myself eating when I am not even in the mood! I just am eating.
I hesitated to share this. The re entrance to the 180's. It scared me enough to get back a little on track. So that's good. I would rather hover around 169-172. Mama ain't happy at 182. But I am still not ready to fully commit to eating healthy. I want to pout like a 2 year-old and say I DONT WANNA QUIT EATING CHOCOLATE! But I will get there...get back to more positive choices than negative.
Just know we can. You can. I have. I will. You will. If you choose. It's a new day everyday. It really is within our power. No one else can make us choose right, or make us choose health....we have to make that decision every day. And some days we won't make the right choice. But there is always tomorrow I guess. Always the next hour, the next minute.
xoxo. Here is to fighting the good fight. Every day. Here is to winning more battles than losing. Here's to owning up to our failures and to celebrating our accomplishments.