Monday, August 31, 2009
It was full of tops, one pair of jeans, and a very nice black dress...tags still on it. Alas, the jeans and dress and just a few of the tops are too big and very high quality, but that is good news for someone else! Alexis, I think we talked about this, but you must be much taller than me! Kathi or maybe Lynn, I am thinking the dress or jeans would be great for you guys. They are both a size 18. Also, shoot me an email if anyone would like me to send them a few tops.
Other thoughts for the day:
Do you know what annoys me to the point of neck snapping someone into eternal sleepy time? Gum chomping. Oh...it's horrible. I want to say you are a 55 year old woman. Keep it closed sister.
Blog stalkers...the people you will never know that read your blog. I am pretty sure I have some anonymous readers and among them are Brad Pitt, the Dalai Lama, and Oprah. Lot's of possibilities there.
I still slap my own hand that I never pause to think how far I have come, bc I am too focused on reaching the next goal.
I have often wondered how getting food in our "little pouch" made us not hungry. It didnt really make sense because I always thought that food had to make it into our lower stomach before we could feel satisfied. Today while surfing the web, I found an interesting article from 2005 on NY Times and liked this description:
The Lap-Band, as the device is called, squeezes his stomach into a bottom-heavy hourglass shape with an upper pouch about the size of a walnut. Filling the pouch stimulates nerves that create a sensation of fullness. The small opening to the lower stomach slows digestion to delay the onset of hunger pangs.
When is the last time you hand wrote a letter and mailed it to someone? For me it was last fall, but isnt it wonderful to get a handwritten letter in the mail?
I am actually hungry right now. Physical hunger. That rarely happens since my last fill.
And we will end with a little known fact about Amy: I won, for two years in a row, a local chicken clucking contest. You know, for sounding like a chicken? I also do a fabulous barnacle impression.
But I have kinda been going gonzo with the shopping. Just a few things here and there, but I can't wait to show you guys my outfits, bc, for example...the dress I am wearing for the dressy night (I vlogged about it several months ago) is super cute and a size 16. It is almost too big ( I can wear a smaller size in a dress)...so it will be up for grabs!
Anywhooo, I got ANOTHER dress last night. It is cream with black polka dots. It has straps that criss-cross in the back. Oh man...precious if I do say so myself. I am going to wear my hot pink patent leather pumps with it and some pink accessories. Since I am wearing black and brown today, I wanted to test run the pink bangle and earrings. Here is the bangle.
Also, Tracey gave me an early birthday present last night. We have been waffling back and forth between three perfumes...Victoria Secrets Sexy Little Things Noir, the new Guess, or Ed Hardey. I got Ed Hardey. Smells gooood.I was already in my pj's when he gave it to me. It was probably like 7 pm. hahaha...see Tracey's motorcycle lamp in the background? My mom gave it to him for Christmas and if you press a button it makes motorcycle noises. It doesnt really go with my interior design for the living room, but he loves it...and sometimes you have to compromise right?
He did not gift wrap that himself, but picked it out bc I heart stars!
Let us start with this picture I posted back in April. It will make me feel better to see the changes.
Angie and I were talking about different body shapes and how our respective bodies are holding up. I was thinking about taking pictures but instead took a video. Bootiliciousness in motion! I would also like to add before you view the video, that I almost didn't post it. Apparently, the old saying that the camera adds 10 pound is incorrect. I believe it adds 50. BUT, you know I believe in full disclosure so I shall share with you...my friends
Sorry that the lighting is so bad. It didnt look that way on the camera!
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Advantages of Being a Man:
· Your last name stays put.
· The garage is all yours.
· Wedding plans take care of themselves.
· Chocolate is just another snack.
· You can be President. (It is coming. It will be. Yes we Can)
· You can never be pregnant. (Although I had a dream the other night that Tracey was carrying our baby)
· You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. (Don't wear a tshirt ladies...be glorious in your splender)
· You can wear NO shirt to a water park
· Car mechanics tell you the truth
· The world is your urinal. (hahhaha...true dat)
· You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
· You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
· Same work, more pay.
· Wrinkles add character.
· Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
· People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
· New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
· One mood all the time.
· Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
· You know stuff about tanks..
· A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
· You can open all your own jars..
· You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
· If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend
· Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. (ain't this the truth)
· Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
· You almost never have strap problems in public.
· You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
· Everything on your face stays its original color.
· The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
· You only have to shave your face and neck. (Not true as much these days, Tracey gives me a run for my $)
· You can play with toys all your life.
· One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
· You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
· You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
· You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. (HOLLA!!!!)
· You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
So I pulled it out of the microwave. My heart fluttering.
AND DROPPED THE FREAKING THING ALL OVER THE FLOOR, WALL, WIRES, ETC. gone...every last bit of it.
So what did a professional girl like myself do? Said some phrase that involved Fuck...my go-to cuss word when I am angry- slammed a door, and got on my knees and cleaned it up like cinderella. I tried not to cry.
This is karmic retribution from my sunkist isnt it?
I wanna go home and go to bed. The End. Game Over.
1lb ground beef (93/7 is my preference)
half a diced onion
3 tsp chili powder
1 small can tomato sauce
1 small can of corn
5 soft taco sized tortilla shells
grated mexican cheese
sour cream (light or ff)
Brown beef with onions. Pour in tomato sauce. Add corn. Add chili powder. Let simmer for about 5 minutes.
Grease bottom of 9x9 pan. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lay one shell in pan. spread guaco and sour cream on shell (like making a pizza.). Spread meat mixture all over shell. Sprinkle cheese over entire area. Top with some diced tomatos. Add another shell on top and repeat all the above steps. Keep doing this until you run out of shells. On your last shell, add one more layer of meat.
Since the shells are round and your pan is square, I added the meat mixture in each corner of the pan to fill it all up. I put a dallop of the sour cream and guaco in each corner as well, topped with cheese and diced tomatoes. Put it in the oven for 15 minutes. Pull out and top with shredded lettuce, more cheese, and diced tomatoes. Bake for 5 more minutes.
Hey...I didnt say it was the lowest calorie thing but it was so good. Tracey went back for seconds (which he usually doesnt do bc he is watching his figure...eye roll). It went down well even with my restriction. We almost finished the whole darn thing! You could add whatever though...olives, chives, hot sauce.
Apparently...dare I say...there is more than one Amy in the world (gasp). I started to notice when commenting on others posts that there were other comments from me and I had no recollection of posting it! hahaha....then I realized it wasn't me! I should have copyrighted my name...lol...
Anywhooo, I changed it in my blogger profile so now when I post it should show up as Amy W. Hope that helps.
Also, while piddling in blogger, I discovered they have a new version of post editor. It has tons of new features and let's you work with your pictures better. For example, it doesnt put your picture at the beginning of the post, but right where your want it! NICE! In case you too did not know about this, just go to your dashboard, click on the settings tab, then the basic tab, then scroll down to where it says POST EDITOR, and make sure you have the new version selected. If you click on the little hyperlink next to it you can read about the new features! Fun times!
But I cant find spell check in this new feature...which could be a huge problem. So if you know where spell check is please let me know!
This is how I justify it in my head:
Since I dont drink alchee-hol:
It's like my glass of wine?
I dont drink beer so its like me having 2 beers?
The man on the corner this morning was drinking a beer at 7:45...can't I indulge too?
Shame...I feel like I should request a little brown bag for it. It is 300 empty calories, but what if:
I drink lots of water afterwards?
What if I count it as a meal?
As my form of coffee?
OKAY FINE! It's not a good choice. But I didnt name this darn blog Once Upon a Time in the Land of Cheese and Sunkist for nothing! And just in case you are wondering, yes...yes I did have a cheese stick with my Sunkist this morning.
On a positive note, I have learned to not overreact when I make these less then nutritious choices. For awhile, I would freak out...thinking "This is the beginning of the end. This is where I ruin it and never get back on track". That all or nothing mentality? I know I will get this out of my system, that I will continue to make better choices, that I havent fallen off the wagon...I am just dragging a little toe!
Is it Friday yet?
Monday, August 24, 2009
Playing DDR with one of the best Leaders/Managers of all time. Not my current boss. I usually dont like pics from behind bc I usually have "shirt is stuck on my ass-shelf" issues.
Opening some of my presents. Notice pointed toe. It just happens!
Friday, August 21, 2009
Please remember my current dilemma. I have Old Navy jeans from 2002, size 20, that won't even button. But Liz went in the other day and tried some on, and they fit...so she her success encouraged me to go and find some too!
They dont carry 20 jeans in short, but I was willing to get them tailored if need be. I grabbed a couple of different styles, one pair of khakis, and a few shirt in XXL. Off to the dressing room, which is like a war zone bc this is the last weekend before school starts, and there were teens, and tweens everywhere showing their clothes to their moms. Then the moms would tsk tsk, and they would argue, and the world started to spin, and I had a flashback moment to shopping with my mom. Good times.
So, back to reality. I tried on the 20's, pulled them up, silent prayer that they would at least button. They were all toooo big! hahahaa! Especially in the waist. The XXL tops were too big also. So, out I go again and grab some 18's. Fit great in the waist, little snug in the calves. Oh well, didnt care! The 20's were too big and that is all that mattered!
I skipped to Victoria Secrets and grabbed a pair of XL panties. Tried them on in the dressing room. They fit!
And so it is my friends, so it is!
Also, I was staring at my ticker today. My mind doesnt really register the number 235. When I go to write my weight down somewhere, or when I say it aloud, I say 253. It is amazing to me that I am now closer to 200 than 300.
I am 29. Born and raised in Topeka, Kansas. I am the youngest of 3 kids. My brother is 37, and my sister 45. My sister says I came out of the womb screaming "here I am, pay attention to me and take my picture". Some things never change :)
It took me 8 years to graduate college. I took a couple years off, worked full-time, changed my major three times. Majored in theatre for 2 years, then Education for 2 years, and finally Communication for 2 years!
After college, I got a map of the United States and picked Pensacola. Moved here by myself, never had been here before. Eventually my sister moved here as well. I am jonesing to move again. Want to go north a little, maybe to the Smokies.
Wasnt looking for anyone when I met Tracey. We met at Home Depot (where I worked in the paint department with my wonderful college degree). He worked in Electrical. I fell in love with him rather quickly. He is/was different then any man I had ever met. He knew his stuff and that is so attractive. He was at the end of a very sad 17 year marriage, and at times I didnt know if I could wait. But I did. And now that we can love each other the way we want, we appreciate it even more. He is 43, has 5 kids.
I am not a religious person. I do believe in the power of positive thoughts, kindness, and energy. If I were to believe in life after death, I feel the most connected to the beliefs of Buddhism. I understand other's need to believe and have faith. I respect that and love to learn about other faiths. Sometimes believing that this is it, this is our one life, is daunting!
I thought I was fat long before I was. By the time I hit junior high, I was a size 14/16 and had to have my skirt for drillteam/dance team specially made by sewing 2 "regular size" skirts together.
Sometimes I pee when I laugh. The last time this happened was New Years Eve a couple of years ago. My bf Lisa and I were on my parents boat playing a board game with my mom and dad. My mom was wearing her favorite gold lame' top, and had a couple shots of tequila. She was sweating, and yelling at my dad a very dirty word to get him to guess the word rug. It was so funny. My bladder concurred!
Sometimes I wonder about the people who read my blog that I dont know about. Do you ever do this?
Along that same thought, sometimes I worry that I put too much info out there. It wouldnt be that hard to find me if you really wanted to. But, with great risk comes great opportunity.
I have always been loud. I used to make new years resolutions that I would be quieter. It just isnt happening. Some people love that about me, other's...not so much. I can see how I might be annoying.
I never thought I would have surgery. It seemed like cheating to me. And then in November of '08 I went to a "meet the doc" with my sister. I was banded Jan. 27th, 2009. I have lost 92 pounds. I know now, it's not "cheating". It is an awesome tool...and sometimes it is really hard.
I love dancing. I love anything that has to do with the water. I sing all the time. At work, in the bathroom, in my car.
Sometimes I am so concerned with making others happy, I let people walk over me. I am working on this. It is hard for me.
This is my thought about life: It is so unpredictable. You can spend days, weeks, months...worrying about something that never happens, and the things you don't worry about...eventually do happen. So don't get bogged down in the "what ifs" and "should haves". Love with abandon. Laugh whenever you can, but never if it causes someone else pain. If you do good, you will get good. If you do bad, you will get that too! There will always be people out there, for whatever reason, that want to bring you down, do not support you, or do not understand you. Life is too short to care about these people. It is also too short to worry about what you look like in a swimsuit. So put it on, and do your thang hunny! People will remember your smile, humor, and heart more then your cellulite and fat rolls.
*I forget all of this every so often (see swimsuit thought).
Sometimes I eat strange things. The other day I had some croutons in my desk drawer. I dipped them on dressing and at them.
I cry a lot. At movies, tv shows, after a bad dream, Oscar acceptance speeches, reality shows...I am a very emotional person!
I prefer snow over heat.
I dont eat any type of seafood.
I dont like being drunk.
I love cheese.
I still love sunkist and have one every once in awhile.
I burp and say "I had surgery". Now, whenever I burp at work (yes, it happens...I only work with 2 other people though), my coworkers say "Surgery". I also say this when I fart. I dont do THAT at work, but around my family. Now, when I fart, someone will say "Surgery"...hahah
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Why Drinking Water Really is the Key to Weight Loss
by Maia Appleby
Don't roll your eyes! The potion for losing that excess body fat is all around you. It covers two thirds of the planet. If you eat right and exercise at the intensity, frequency and duration proper for you, but still can't get rid of a little paunch here and there, you're probably just not drinking enough water.
No need to get defensive. You're actually quite normal. Most people don't drink enough water. Most people are also carrying around a few more pounds than they would be if they did drink enough water. If you can't seem to get that weight off, try drowning your sorrows in nature's magical weight-loss mineral. It works, and here's why:
"What on Earth is 'metabolism', anyway?" People use the term all the time, but ask them what it means and you'll get all kinds of answers. Merriam Webster defines it as, "The process by which a substance is handled in the body." A little vague, but that's really all it means.
There are many forms of metabolism going on in your body right now, but the one everyone is talking about it the metabolism of fat. This is actually something that the liver does when it converts stored fat to energy. The liver has other functions, but this is one of its main jobs.
Unfortunately, another of the liver's duties is to pick up the slack for the kidneys, which need plenty of water to work properly. If the kidneys are water-deprived, the liver has to do their work along with its own, lowering its total productivity. It then can't metabolize fat as quickly or efficiently as it could when the kidneys were pulling their own weight. If you allow this to happen, not only are you being unfair to your liver, but you're also setting yourself up to store fat.
"I've tried it and I couldn't stand it!" The problem is that, though many decide to increase their water intake, very few stick with it. It's understandable. During the first few days of drinking more water than your body is accustomed to, you're running to the bathroom constantly. This can be very discouraging, and it can certainly interfere with an otherwise normal day at work. It seems that the water is coming out just as fast as it's going in, and many people decide that their new hydration habit is fruitless.
Do take heed , though. What is really happening is that your body is flushing itself of the water it has been storing throughout all those years of "survival mode". It takes a while, but this is a beautiful thing happening to you. As you continue to give your body all the water it could ask for, it gets rid of what it doesn't need. It gets rid of the water it was holding onto in your ankles and your hips and thighs, maybe even around your belly. You are excreting much more than you realize. Your body figures it doesn't need to save these stores anymore; it's trusting that the water will keep coming, and if it does, eventually, the flushing (of both the body and the potty) will cease, allowing the human to return to a normal life. It's true. This is called the "breakthrough point."
One recent finding, as irresponsible as it may be, that caffeine increases the body's fat-burning potential has many people loading up on coffee before going to the gym. This finding may hold some degree of truth in it, but caffeine is, in essence, a diuretic, and diuretics dehydrate. Caffeine may increase the heart rate, causing a few more calories to be burned, but this is at the expense of the muscles, which need water to function properly. This isn't doing your heart any favors, either. It's already working hard enough during your workout. Never mix caffeine and exercise. In fact, your best bet is to stay away from caffeine all together. It's a big bully that pushes your friend water out of your system.
Water is the best beauty treatment. You've heard this since high school, and it's true. Water will do wonders for your looks! It flushes out impurities in your skin, leaving you with a clear, glowing complexion. It also makes your skin look younger. Skin that is becoming saggy, either due to aging or weight loss, plumps up very nicely when the skin cells are hydrated.
In addition, it improves muscle tone. You can lift weights until you're blue in the face, but if your muscles are suffering from a drought, you won't notice a pleasant difference in your appearance. Muscles that have all the water they need contract more easily, making your workout more effective, and you'll look much nicer than if you had flabby muscles under sagging skin.
"Eight glasses a day? Are you kidding?!" It's really not that much. Eight 8-ounce glasses amount to about two quarts of water. This is okay for the average person, but if you're overweight, you should drink another eight ounces for every 25 pounds of excess weight you carry. You should also up this if you live in a hot climate or exercise very intensely.
This water consumption should be spread out throughout the day. It's not healthy at all to drink too much water at one time. Try to pick three or four times a day when you can have a big glass of water, and then sip in between. Don't let yourself get thirsty. If you feel thirsty, you're already becoming dehydrated. Drink when you're not thirsty yet.
Do you think water is yucky? Drinking other fluids will certainly help hydrate your body, but the extra calories, sugar, additives and whatever else aren't what you need. Try a slice of lemon or lime in the glass, or if you really think you hate water, try a flavored water. Just make sure you read the labels. Remember that you're going to be consuming a lot of this fluid. It's probably a good idea to stop drinking water a good three hours before you go to bed. You know why.
"How cold should it be?" This is debatable. Most experts lean toward cold water, because the stomach absorbs it more quickly. There is also some evidence that cold water might enhance fat burning. On the other hand, warmer water is easier to drink in large quantities, and you might drink more of it without even realizing it. Do whatever suits you, here. Just drink it!
When you drink all the water you need, you will very quickly notice a decrease in your appetite, possibly even on the first day! If you're serious about becoming leaner and healthier, drinking water is an absolute must. If you're doing everything else right and still not seeing results, this might just be what's missing.
Yesterday we went to that training class, and we had to sign a roster. You find you name on the roster and sign right beside it. I found Amy Workman and then signed Amanda. In cursive. Nice and neat as the day is long...I signed Amanda instead of Amy. I don't even know why! There was no Amanda around. It was like I was possessed or something. I had to look at the lady at the sign in table and say "Thats not even my name". hahahahah I crossed it out and signed Amy.
Then, back in the office, my boss got a phone call. I heard her answer and it was our IS department telling her that my coworker's new computer was ready. So I say out loud, "Sounds like someone is getting their new swimsuit"! WHAT? swimsuit? I dont know what was wrong with me, I mean to say computer.
God bless my pointed head.
After my post yesterday about being tight, I sat down for lunch. This is what I had brought
It is quick, easy, kinda bland, and contrary to the picture, not super chunky. I figured I would be good to go. Well, I ate about 3 tablespoons, which included a few little chunks of chicken. And that was all she wrote folks! Something was stuck. I had started eating at 11am bc I had a training to go to at noon. For the next 2 hours or so, I went to the bathroom to "bring up" the slobber that was backing up. I had to keep walking out of the training. So finally, I whispered to my coworker that I was not coming back in the classroom until "I get this motherfu*(&^ up". I went to the bathroom, leaned over the pretty toilet, and after a few really bad dry heaves, something came out.
Now, I have mentioned before that when this happens to me, a good deal of what was in my throat comes out my nose. It is gross. So after I was done dealing with the porcelain god, I walked over to the paper towels to start blowing the rest of the food out my nose. I must not have been holding the paper towel correctly, bc I blew and everything shot on my chest. All of the rice I had eaten from the soup was now on my chest. And my first thought was "OH MY GOD! MAGGOTS!
Then I had to stop and say "No Amy, those arent maggots, that is rice". Have mercy. My mind. So that was gross but I felt better after that.
Later in the day I was sitting at my desk and I felt something in my nose. Thought it was a boogie/nose gremlin, bat in the cave. Nope. It was black bean. Sure enough. Good times.
So, at dinner time, I was fully resigned to just eating some mashed potatoes and green beans, but I decided to give a pork chop a go. I got about 3oz, cut it into pea sized bites...AND NO PROBLEM! I ate it all! So good. And put my mind at ease.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
So, I am still tight (tiz-ite). It's kinda scary isn't it when you have that brief thought flash through your head that you are going to die because you can't get food down. lol...I didnt say it was rational. But I will stick to mushies for a bit longer. I don't have any heartburn, or reflux, etc...so I dont think I am too tight, but definitely tighter then I have been in my nearly 7 months. It is interesting and now I dont snack at all bc I am afraid it will get stuck or ruin my meal. I do miss my Fiber Bar for breakfast. Adios for now dear friend. See you in a few weeks!
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
I had yogurt and a protein shake for lunch yesterday and last night I had some of Tracey's wonderful chili. Sweet mothergoose it is good. I ate about a bowl of it. And I was super full afterwards. Full in my throat kind of feeling, like if I were to tip over it would pour out.
I managed to hold on for almost 2 hours. Then it did come out. Well, just slobber. Thought that it was weird it took so long.
Amy thinks to herself at this point: This might be some tight restriction!
So today I had yogurt for breakfast and less chili for lunch. I was able to finish it, but it took me a good long while. Maybe half an hour? And I had to eat really slow. Oddly slow for me. But it went down and stayed down. I am eager to figure out my restriction level bc if chili gave me problems, I can only imagine what a piece of chicken is going to do!
I failed. I tried this weekend and although I was closer then back in May, the rope still pops out of my hands. I can't pull my body weight long enough to get up. I didnt pout, but when no one was looking, I cried. I don't like to set a goal and not reach it. And I thought I could do it. I am 88 pounds down, been working out, feeling good. It is two ski's for pete's sake!!!! Tracey's little ass literally pops up on the water. We probably won't be back up to the boat until November, so it looks like next year for my water skiing dreams. Screw two ski's, next year I am going straight to one. And when I do ladies, it will be a good day! Expect video.
But, I must brush my ego off and get on with it.
I also set a goal of 90 pounds down by Sept. 3rd. I WILL reach that by Monday (positive thinking there). So, it is time to set my next goal, and while I usually set my goals in 20 or 30 pound increments, I am setting my goal 10 pounds out this time...which will bring me to 100 pounds down!
October 12th. Fitting don't you think? It is Columbus Day. He discovered a new world...or an island...or something...and I am discovering a new body! (Okay, that was a stretch) My next goal after that will be my bandiversary, January 27th. I want to weigh 207 on that day, 120 pounds down.
Let there be light!
Monday, August 17, 2009
When I first met with my doc pre-op, we were looking for any co-morbidity's to help with insurance. We were reaching for straws so he asked me about urinary stress incontinence, or the old sneeze n pee in your panties syndrome (Tracey likes it when I say panties, for the record, I prefer underwear...but if it makes it better when I look at him after I sneeze and say I tinkled in my panties vs i peed in my underwear...I choose panties).
And, yes...even though I have never had children so theoretically my "lady station" (as Meg referred to it) should be tight...apparently not. But I am happy to report that it has gone away.
My, my, my....we have been busy little blogger bees over the weekend haven't we? WOW, it has taken me last night and this morning to catch up on everyones posts! But I have done it. Ribbon for me!
I just don't know where to start. With the good or the bad?
First, we went to my parents boat/house this weekend. I was determined to stay on track. Over the last month I have done really good during the week, and then blown it on the weekend. I would gain a few, lose them, then gain them, then lose them. Waste of time yes? So, with temptation looming, I was determined. Strong as an oak. During the 6 hour journey north, I didnt eat one bad thing from a gas station. I drank water. When we got to the boat, I ate a meal and no snacking for me all day.
And then....Saturday came. Did real good until we went to the movies (Time Travelers Wife) and at the movies I shared some nachos, a candy bar, and a little popcorn with Tracey. When we got back to the boat we had peach cobbler. YUM! Amy was in trouble! Captain was going down with the ship!
Yesterday on the ride home, the shi* really hit the fan. Big cookie, sunkist, peanut butter m & m's, TACO BELL, popcorn, apple pie. ahahahahah....how horrible was that?
So today I stepped on the scale....moment of truth....
I lost 5 pounds last week. hahahahaha! Imagine what I would have lost if I hadn't eaten that crap! But, it made me think of Angie's recent loss, and how she only loses weight in a 10 day window every month. It seems to me that I have 2 good weeks of weight loss a month. They are the two weeks that follow my period. What I think we can learn from this is that when I am feeling like I am failing even though I am making all the right choices...I just need to hang on and I will see the benefits. This is true with life yes? What happens is that after being good for 5 or 6 days and NOT losing weight, I have to fight really hard to not throw in the towel and binge. I need to remember that I may in fact be losing fat, but other things are showing up on the scale.
Also, I went in for my scheduled fill today. I think this is fill number 5. I love my doctor. He is really great. He has a doctor that he is training...her name is Angie. Anyways, when I walked in the office he was walking by and said "you are looking so good Amy! How much have you lost?"
I said 87 pounds! And he said "IN THREE MONTHS"? lol...I said no Dr. Friedman...it's been 7 months already!
So he kept telling me how good I looked. I love going there bc they make you feel so damn skinny! We went through the usual series of questions:
Eating junk food? Yes.
Working out? Yes.
Back pain and joint pain better? All gone.
Still pee when you sneeze? No sir.
I have lost 45% of my excess body weight. I went from a 54 BMI to a 39.5.
I told him that sometimes I read on LBT that doctors dont recommend lapband for people as big as I was. He said the doctor he trained under believes that too, but not him. He says that the band works for the people that want it too...and that it doesnt have anything to do with how big you were when you started.
I told him about the cruise. He hesitated and wanted to make sure I wanted a fill. I said yes.
So, they withdrew just 3.2 ccs. I have a 10cc-11cc band. They put all that back and added another cc. So I am somewhere around 4.2ccs. I don't go back until right before Thanksgiving.
OOOH yeah! He told me that people have come into his office talking about me, how much weight I've lost, and how good I look. I don't know who these people are...but I can tell I like them already. I work for the health care system that provided my surgery. I dont work at the hospital, but here on campus. So, I assume these are employees that have seen me. I didnt share with Dr. Friedman that my secret goal is to be on Lapband commercials. He will find out in due time! hahahahah
Thursday, August 13, 2009
I also stumbled upon this at Target. It's a 2 piece. 21 days until the cruise! HOLLLAAA!
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Talking about Barbie yesterday spurred other Barbie thoughts. I played with Barbie probably until I was 12. I had this HUGE trunk of my barbie stuff I would haul around to off-site locations (like my grandma's). I feel sorry for my friends that I used to play Barbies with because I would dictate what their Barbies should say to my Barbies. In retrospect it was amazing I had friends back then...bossy I was.
Here are some other lessons I learned via Barbs:
1. Cutting Barbies hair does not result in the desired effect one is trying to reach. After watchin Working Girl sometime in the late 80's, I was inspired by Melanie Griffins haircut in the movie. Remember...she went from this
2. When my mom told me not to use my new hair crimper on Barbie, I should have listened. Turns out Amy learned the hard way that Barbie's hair was plastic. It melted all over my new crimper and I was in TROUBLE!
3. When you are using a hair dryer to blow dry Ken's swimsuit, do not place said blow dryer directly on the fabric of Ken's crotch. Again, it turns out that such direct heat melts Ken's little polyester waders.
4. I also learned that I am lucky a psychologist never saw me playing with my Barbies bc they did "IT" a lot! What can I say. I watched a lot cable as a kid and had an older brother who had lots of dirty magazines.
5. I am thankful everyday that my arms bend more then a 45 degrees.
6. And finally, I learned that when my mom told me to pick up all my Barbie stuff or else she would throw it all in a garbage sack and give it to some little kid that would appreciate it...she meant it!
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
So I thought I would share some of my personal thoughts with you. Here's one:
1. I want an engagement ring. And Tracey wants me to have one. That is not the problem. The problem is...and you might not have known this...engagement rings cost money! And while credit for some people is an option, we pay cash for everything. And half of Tracey's paycheck a month goes to child support, so after all the bills are paid, there isnt much left for fancy rings. And I want a fancy ring :) Ever since I was little, I have waited for that day that the man of my dreams slides a beautiful ring on my finger. I blame Barbie. You know how Barbie's left hand has that little hole in it for a ring? And you would lose that darn ring after about 4 hours of Barbie being out of the box? Well, Ken would always propose to Barbie. One of my most favorite Barbie story lines! I do not have the dream of a house full of children. But I do have the dream of the ring. I have the dream of the wedding. I have big ol' sausage fingers and a little baby ring would just not do. Lately all of Tracey's friends have been asking the marriage question, and we say that we have to get the ring first. And then I hear comments like "Oh, I just told Tom that all I need is a string on my finger". REALLY? Good for you. But this will be my first and last marriage. (bc if it doesnt work out then I will move to Maine, live in a shack with my cats). It's my dream okay? Do you know what my boss said when my coworker and I were talking about how rings? "I just not that shallow. I would rather have a boat or something." SHALLOW? I drive an old car and live in a fixer upper? And while I would love a boat...how expensive of a ring do you think I am talking about? And a boat doesnt last forever fool! Diamonds do! hahah
So basically. I have wedding fever. After the cruise, Tracey is going to fix up his truck (minor repairs) and sell it. Yes, the man is selling his truck to buy me a ring. I love him. Then it will be operation wedding, and we will have to save for that as well. Small wedding probably, but then a big reception under a white tent. You all are invited. You can come to Pensacola for vacation! However I am getting married in a cool month bc this girl does not like to sweat!
I guess this post was band related after all....wedding BAND related! hahaah...
Thanks for listening! I know everything happens in due time.
Anyways. HELLO EVERYONE! How is your Tuesday going. Mine is painful bc I am at work, and I need to do something about that besides bitch about it...but bitching is so much easier! But that will be for another blog entry another day.
Today I would like to share with you to blogger related stories.
First, I finally was able to watch Catherines vlog from last week. Tracey walked by and saw her talking and he said "She doesn't look like a lapband girl". Par-don me? I looked at him and said "What does a 'lapband girl' look like"? He quickly cleared it up and what he was trying to say (and these are my words now) was Catherine is skinny and doesn't look like those of us who might be...shall I say...a little more fluffy? I thought that speaks to Catherine's progress! And she had an interesting response back that basically one day soon we shall all hopefully look like we never needed the band!
Second, I had a dream last night. I have really vivid, detailed, elaborate dreams. I dreamt Tiffani tried to kill me. Granted, I was going to shoot her first, but I dropped the gun and she picked it up and pulled the dang trigger several times (no bullets, close call)! It was some weird dream (clearly) and I was running away cross country with two other girls and Tiffani was trying to foil our escape...she was bad...that's all I know.
I let Tiffani know on FB today. She wanted to know if she was skinny in my dream! lol...
Monday, August 10, 2009
Also, you know I have been hunting for a swimsuit for the cruise. I have all the swimsuits you guys have seen my in, but the are getting a little big and I wanted something a little more sophisticated for lounging with my Jackie-O sunglasses on the pool deck. I didnt want a tankini...was going for a one piece. After almost throwing in the towel, I found this online at Landsend.
Friday night we went to Red Robin and I had my usually chicken tortilla soup (320 calories). Not bad. But before the soup I ate some onion rings (minus the onions bc I don't like them...I pull them out and just eat the crust).
We went to see Julie/Julia. True story about a blogger who decided to cook her way through the Julia Childs cookbook. Meryl Streep and the actor who played her husband (she was Julia) were adorable and their relationship was a wonderful romance. Good movie!
Saturday for breakfast I had a sunkist (gasp) and one reeses peanut butter cup. THEN, when we went to Walmart...we finally broke down and bought these....
In the ice cream section of Walmart. They come in a six pack. This weekend Tracey ate three...and I ate three! OH BOY! They were damn good ladies! I also had another sunkist on Saturday and some fried pickles yesterday.
Today, shockers of all shockers...the scale was up 2 pounds. And bc today is official weigh-in day, I had to change my ticker to reflect that! DARN IT!
Too bad bc I ate really well and made positive choices all week and then messed it up with the weekend. Well...today is Monday and its a new week! Let's do this!
I can deal yo! Not too bad!
But you all are right. Who cares! I was having fun and my body will continue to get better. Pa-shaw I say!
Also, my Auntie Flo came to visit today...so perhaps it was PMS that made it so much worse?
Regardless...I love you!
Sunday, August 9, 2009
And as you have learned, I do not really care. I mean I am concerned what I look like...but I can shove that somewhere back in my mind so I don't let my body inhibit how good of time I will have. So I did. And I had a great time. Tracey and I played with the kids, having diving contests, etc. I did a cartwheel off of the diving board...I did toe touches, flips. All 242 pounds of my fabulousness.
Then...today...I saw the pictures.
Tracey looks pretty awesome yes? I on the other hand do not. I am not looking for affirmation and love, or seeking compliments. But I just hate that I do not feel this fat! (That sounded weird)I guess I didn't estimate how my loose fat and skin would shift and move like it was possessed by an inner alien just waiting to break out. I do not feel that I look like this. And now, I feel embarrassed. And I dont get embarrassed easily. But while I feel that the crowd was thinking "I can't believe she has the much self-confidence", I wonder now if they were thinking "Damn she is huge. I hope she doesnt break the diving board."
Thursday, August 6, 2009
I bought some white denim/stretch/cotton/bootcut pants from Sears a few weeks back with the upcoming cruise in mind. I can just see me whilst I lean on the railing, gazing over the blue sea, wind whipping my hair, cut sandals, white trousers, precious top....
Anyway, they are way to long and a little gappy in the waist. The story of my life. I did discover today though that they have those little tabs on the side that I can move back to a second button, so I am hoping that will help with the waist gap. They still need to be hemmed though and I want the pockets cut out and sewn shut.
So I take them to a place for alterations. We took tiny Tracey's pants there to have them taken in, good price, nice work. It is actually a big and tall store for men. One of the ladies that does the alterations is a tiny little Asian woman. When I came out of the dressing room she furrowed her brow and I could tell she was "sizing me up" haha...pun...and thinking that the thighs of the pants were a little snug. Again...welcome to my life.
She marked where she would hem them and when I told her about the pockets she said "Don't you think they are a little tight".
No she did-ent!
It was one of those brief out-of-body Matrix experiences where I was hovering over the two of us and I could see me snapping her neck or sitting on her. Instead, I came back into my body and told her I had weight loss surgery and in a months time they should fit just right.
She said good idea.
That's right. Good service recovery :)
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
So, remember...my current measurements are:
Waist: 39" (I measure the smallest part of my stomach)
Old Navy's measurement for women's pants (not the plus size line) are:
Waist: 39 1/2"
Hips: 50 1/2"
For Women's plus:
Waist: 41 1/4"
Hips: 50 1/2"
Thigh: 29 1/2"
So, according to that, I should be able to fit into a "regular" size 20. But this is far from true if the pants I have Old Navy, circa 2002, don't even fit. Maybe they were smaller back then? HMPH...
So, for SnG's, I looked up Lane Bryant's measurements for a size 20.
Monday, August 3, 2009
Sundried tomato sauce.
The rest goes like this.
I put some EVOO in a skillet. Threw in some diced garlic and chopped sundried tomatoes. Tossed in my raw chicken breast, all cubed up very nicely. Cooked it all until the chicken was done. Poured in the sauce and some chopped cooked carrots (bc I dont really like carrots and this way you cant taste them but I am getting a veggie). I let that simmer while I cooked the whole wheat egg noodles. Then I just combined all of it and YUM YUM!
I was so excited you should have seen how much I put on my plate...lol...I couldnt eat it all...but I was going to die trying.
Just wanted to share.
I have never been on cruise before. I am pretty pumped. However, did you know the following:
- you can order room service...for free...24/7
- you can eat whatever you want at dinner? order 5 kinds of desserts if you want?
- they have a Death By Chocolate buffet at midnight?
- a 24/7 pizza bar?
- basically FOOD FOR FREE WHENEVER?
I wish I had only known this in my formerly fatty lifestyle. Doesnt it sound like a big girls dream?
Alas, I have left that lifestyle in the past. I can however look in my proverbial rearview mirror though and still see Fluffier Amy hopping up and down waving at me, albeit a little winded.
So what is a girl to do? DANGER CITY MY FRIENDS. I will be just 2 weeks out from a fill...so maybe I won't be able give myself over completely to gluttony...but you and I both know that liquid chocolate just slides right down :)
I expect I will gain a few pounds. And I am actually okay with that. I want to enjoy everything and not punish myself. I am just worried that I might go gonzo crazy.
Too late for that huh?
I went and told the horrible manager. They said something like *grunt* *hmph*.
So the next time I went in I went and checked it out. Dangerous seat still there. I did a survey on my receipt and mentioned this.
WELL, last week when I was there I went into the dressing room and noticed that the damn thing was still there but now the material was actually torn and ripped where the screw tip pops up and hurts people. I happened to have my camera with me and took pictures.
So, clearly...the question is now being thrown in front of our fair lawyer ladies Catherine and Bandit...can we sue? How about a class action lawsuit? lol. How many people have to be involved to form a "class"? If Mary goes and gets poked (hahah sounds dirty) that makes 2 of us. Is that a class? OOOHH...or what if Bandit goes and gets poked too! Then there is 3 of us! Should I go back and get it to make me bleed?
I will bring these people to courts. I will punish them for taking petites out of the stores. Tough love ladies. Tough love.
Of course, I will have to delete this post bc it can be used for evidence I assume.
lol...I am joking.
I get my 5th fill on August 17th. Do you guys remember how I was debating on whether or not to get it? Well, I am. My portion sizes on "good foods" like chicken, steak, etc have gotten bigger and I can comfortably eat at least 2 cups of food during meal time. I would like to trim that back a smidge.
Liz asked me to take my measurements, which as a good bloggin buddy I did this morning and they are at home. So I will post them tonight. She has a good point. I am not much of a numbers person but it's interesting to see that I am a size 20W and what that might look like with someone who has a different body shape.
At Sears this weekend Tracey got another lesson in fashion. I make him watch What Not To Wear with me and he now uses terms like A-line skirt, empire waist, pencil skirts, and espadrilles. Precious. But while we were at Sears I was trying on the Levi's 20W and they fit. Funny bc I have some Levi's 20's at home and those suckers barely zip and give me a megasaurus muffin top. NOM.
So he learned the very valuable lesson in what the W after a number means.
I am glad I can be of service.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Hmm...looking for petite, red, size 4.
I can't find any damn petites. Only average. I asked the sales lady and behold...she says "We arent carrying petites or talls anymore in store. You have to order them online". I thought I would punch her in the face and then break down and cry. I just stared at her. Seriously? The one place that I can walk in and buy a pair of jeans that don't gap at the waist and fit my length...has now taken away my size and I have to shop online just like everywhere else? I asked her if they weren't popular or selling well. She said "OH NO, they sell great...we just dont have room for them".
I dont know if this is everyone, or just our local store on the corner of Assmunches and Torture.
So. That sucked.
On Saturday Tracey and I went shopping and I did find some Levi's, size 20W that fit. They gap in the waist, but they will do. They were only $19.99.
Also, we walked around the mall and just went into stores, looked around, etc. I have lived here for almost 3 years and have never walked around the entire mall. We looked at rings. Fun. But I was also able to go into shops that I wouldnt go in without someone skinny bc I know the salespeople would be like "What is Buffarilla doing in here?" This include stores like Gap, Buckle, etc.
I also went into Victoria Secrets. If you remember that last time I was measured for a bra it was at Lane Bryant. The said I needed a 40DDD. Well, the band was too tight so I had to get an extender. If I didnt, then it was tight and gave me double boob. The straps fall down, the cups gap. Again...death to Lane Bryant.
So into Victoria Secrets. I got measured. 40DD. The tiny little assistant picked out some bras for me and off Tracey and I go to the fitting room. Guess what? Boys cant go into dressing rooms with the ladies at VS! Did you know this? I dont really know why? I mean we can get naughty in ANY dressing room.
What else was weird was having this tiny little girl in the room with me looking at my bra while I was half naked. I didnt have a problem with the naked thing, just the fat thing. Oh well. The bras fit GREAT! Totally different than Lane Bryant. I will be buying a Biofit this payday!
Sorry about the small size of the one of the right. If you click on the picture you should be able to see it a little bigger.
My port is not under the big incision like I thought it was for about 6 weeks after surgery. It is actually about 1 or 2 inches below the big incision. I can't feel my port at all. I thought it WAS under the big incision bc I can press on it and feel something hard and lumpy...but that is apparently just scar tissue :)